We’re in the home stretch.  Three divisional rematches are all that remain.  Does your team have what it takes to make that last push?  Spoiler for Turbo – it doesn’t.  We’ve reached the part of the season where starting the wrong coach is the difference between joy and therapy, as Balls of Hate found out last week.

Mad Dogs (7-4) vs. HAIRBEAR (4-7)

Mad Dogs are running as predictable and steady as their coach Kyle Shanahan — high floor, no drama, no nonsense. Jared Goff plus Henry + Cook is as old-school as it gets: “Three yards and hope your defense doesn’t implode.”

Meanwhile HAIRBEAR’s starters already delivered points and a lead — but we all know what will happen when Detroit or Philly start dropping fireworks.

Prediction: Mad Dogs rally late and win by 6.

 

Shock Value (6-5) vs. Team Blitz-Craig (8-3)

Blitz-Craig is already zapping the scoreboard while Shock Value is still booting up. Shock Value has strong skill players but may be missing the core problem — playing against the league’s literal embodiment of “just enough points at all times.” Blitz-Craig deploys a balanced roster with everyone capable of dropping 15 without warning. Shock Value, you’re flickering — better surge before Craig fries you. Blitz-Craig, don’t short-circuit now, playoffs are near.

Prediction: Unless Saquon and Pittman do wizard things, this could be over by halftime.  Blitz-Craig wins by 15.

 

nWo (3-8) vs. nWo Wulfpack (6-5)

It’s faction warfare. nWo is off to a rare lead, but Wulfpack’s got Hurts, CMC, and Jefferson ready to howl. No team in Week 12 has a clearer blueprint than Wulfpack:

• Hurts
• McCaffrey
• Jefferson
• Kittle

That is just four nuclear missile silos pointed at your season. Yet nWo showed last week that records don’t matter — knocking off Trash Pandas in a huge upset.

Dak & Drake London need absolute ceiling performances to hang with a roster that could realistically drop 140 without sweating. That will be tough considering that Drake London isn’t playing.  This one’s personal.  nWo, enjoy the lead — it’s about the only thing you’ve led all season. Wulfpack, time to put the pup down.

Prediction: Wulfpack wins by 20 and keeps playoff hopes alive.

 

Turbo (5-6) vs. Trash Pandas (8-3)

If ever there was a “fantasy DFS lineup disguised as a regular team,” it’s Trash Pandas — with breakout specials like Shaheed, Puka, Njoku, and whatever QB they scrapped off waivers that week.  Turbo counters with Lamar + AJ Brown + McBride — and that right there is a core capable of dropping 90 points by themselves.  If this becomes a shootout, Trash Pandas are in trouble unless Puka and Njoku go off.  If it becomes a low-scoring slog, Turbo may collapse under lack of depth.  Turbo, time to rev the engine — or get dumped by the Pandas.

Prediction: Turbo — slight upset call

 

Balls of Hate (4-7) vs. Nigerian Yaks (5-6)

Hate came out swinging with Houston’s D, while the Yaks are still grazing. Kyren Williams better stampede or this one’s over.  Let’s be clear:

• Amon-Ra
• Metcalf
• Kenneth Walker
• Stafford (who can spike for 350 any week)

This is a professional offense.

The Yaks counter with Bryce Young at QB and Kyren Williams holding up the entire offense like a man pushing a stalled pickup uphill.

The Yaks need:

• Tee Higgins to resurface
• Kyren to score twice
• Bryce Young to… well… be something other than Bryce Young

The Hate machine is already rolling. Yaks are in legitimate playoff panic.

Prediction: Balls of Hate win by 12 and keep slim playoff hopes alive.

 

Teddy Ruxpins (5-6) vs. Bolsheviks (5-6)

It’s a battle of 5-6 desperation. Kelce vs Andrews, Mayfield vs Williams — this one’s going to be a grind.  This is a playoff elimination match disguised as a regular fantasy game.

Roster-wise, this is a monster fight:

• Bijan + Etienne can be one of the best RB combos in the league
• Caleb Williams can drop 30 out of nowhere
• Davante Adams might go nuclear against half the NFL

But the counter is sneaky dangerous:

• Kelce
• Zay Flowers
• Mayfield reliably putting up volume

If Adams and the RBs hit?
Bolsheviks take it.

If Kelce suddenly decides to play like he is single?
Teddy stays alive.

Prediction: Ruxpins win by 5 in a low-scoring slugfest.

 

My Ball Zach Ertz (5-6) vs. LiQ-ourballs (5-6)

It’s a must-win for both. Purdy and Hall vs Allen and Swift — this one’s got fireworks written all over it.  Two 5–6 teams. Both just dropped 115+ in Week 11. Both need this to avoid needing miracles next week.

LiQ’s lineup is volatile but explosive:

LiQ’s lineup is volatile but explosive:

• Swift + Jones (elite combined PPR potential)
• JSN popping in Seattle
• Aubrey doesn’t miss

But MBZE has the most stable and efficient portfolio:

• Purdy is a model of consistency
• Breece Hall can solo a matchup
• DJ Moore & Jake Ferguson bring weekly volume floors

Prediction: The Josh Allen implosion sinks Liq this week.  Mad Dogs win it easy.

 

Hamburg Hooligans (8-3) vs. T**m H**s (4-7)

T**m H**s starting Brissett is a cry for help.  But credit where due — Lamb and Bowers is a serious route-running hit squad. If both fire, T**m H**s could absolutely steal this.

Hamburg, meanwhile, is doing everything with grit and refusal to die, starting Sam Darnold and still leading the league in scoring. Everything in their offense revolves around:

• Diggs
• Rice
• Taylor delivering weekly stability

If this becomes a WR slugfest, Hamburg likely pulls away.

If Brissett plays like a real NFL quarterback…
Well… unlikely, but possible.

Prediction: Classic trap game, but Hooligans win by 7 in a comeback.